Archive for the 'How Not To Be Depressed' Category
By Charlene M Brown
Harley Storey, a Life Coach out of New Zealand says: “Somewhere in our life’s journey we choose to focus on the garbage or the gold. (Often the gold is hidden in the garbage!) If [we] dwell on the garbage we become grumpy. If we look at the gold we become grateful. Life is crap. Life is beautiful. Life is both. The question is, which will you focus on?”
This is all a very colorful way of saying do you look at your life as half empty—always wanting for things you don’t have; or do you see it as more than half full—enjoying and being grateful for the things you do have?
Life is all about perspective. And which perspective you take is entirely up to you! That’s right, it’s YOUR choice what you decide to focus on, the garbage or the gold. And it really is all in your attitude!
I used to be the most pessimistic person I knew. I was always grumpy, angry and in a bad mood. My health was poor and I was always tired—sleepy tired and tired of people and things and life! I often had a headache and got “knock me down” sick several times per year.
Then one day, I decided that being like this all the time was not doing me any good! I made a conscious decision to stop focusing on the garbage and start looking for the gold!
This decision wasn’t easy and certainly didn’t happen overnight. Sometimes I slipped back into my old ways (and got the accompanying headaches, sickness and aches and pains). It was in those times that I had to fight to get back to the Healthy!
Again, this was sometimes very challenging! But I kept at it.
Today, 8 years after making that first decision to change my outlook, I am as healthy as I have ever been, I almost never get headaches or body aches, my temperament is flowing and easy-going, and stress is almost nonexistent in my world! And I really mean that!
I share this not to brag about it, but to show you that if you choose to, you can change your outlook too!
For me, it wasn’t about taking drastic measures (and that was hard to realize—I can be a bit of an “all or nothing” type of lady sometimes), but making smaller decisions on a daily, weekly, monthly, consistent basis.
It was about letting go and stop trying to control every single little detail; it was about learning to enjoy wherever I was instead of always trying to get to the next moment; it was about being fully present wherever I happened to be; it was about trusting the process of Life rather than worrying my pretty little head about it; it was about creating new thoughts to replace my old, negative ones.
Indeed, it was about letting go of the past to let my present and future in.
I literally had to find the silver lining. I literally had to sometimes go digging through the garbage to find the gold (and all that glitters is definitely not gold!).
But I did it! One decision at a time!
And you can to.
But only if you choose to!
Do You Love Your Life Now!? I DO!! (Because I have chosen to!)
By Charlene M Brown
I was listening to the radio this morning and they were talking about a recent study that finds women are significantly less happy than they were 40 years ago. The study found that this was true through all age brackets as compared to their male counterparts of the same age bracket. And the trend was virtually the same regardless of marital status, child status and economic status.
By Charlene M Brown
What are all the things you can’t do!?
How much time do you spend thinking about them?
By Charlene M Brown
Having a Positive Attitude is all about your frame of mind.
It is also about how you spend your time.
And who you spend it with.
Think about this—when you spend your time with people who encourage and support you, you tend to feel really good about yourself, like you’re on top of the world and can do anything at all. (Psst, you can!)
But flip the coin—how do you feel when you are around people who always tell you that you “can’t”. They never support you and they always tell you how hard everything is going to be. They take a nice shiny pin and stick it right in the balloon of your dreams. They really bring you down.
There are a few reasons for this, one of which is that they believe in the concept of “lack.”
Now, most of us do, but we don’t really realize it. We have been taught to believe this all of our lives. The concept of lack says that there is a limited amount of “stuff” in the Universe and only a few people can have that “stuff” (money, power, wealth, etc.).
I can guarantee you the people who poke holes in your dreams believe in this. They say things like, “Oh, why don’t you stay in this career because it’s safe and secure.” Or when you are trying to take time for yourself, they always find some other emergency that you HAVE to help out with.
I’m here to tell you that this perception of Lack is untrue! In fact, the Universe is governed by just the opposite rule, that of Abundance, of “asking and you shall receive.”
This is called the Law of Attraction. This basically boils down to you getting what you think about.
Why then, are there so many “bad” things in the world if we get what we think about?
Very good question: there is certainly no shortage on crime and poverty in the world. But this is the result of all of the people who are constantly thinking about them.
Have you ever watched the 6-o-clock news? It’s full of stories of all the things going wrong with the world. Rarely do you see things going right. If you watch this regularly, you are only becoming an expert on war, crime, scandal and murder.
The people who are always dashing your dreams have the same effect. By listening to them, you become an expert on all the things you can’t do and learn to focus on them.
With that said, if you are ready to stop complaining and DO SOMETHING about this, there are a few steps you can take:
1. Find positive, self-affirming stuff to do—things you enjoy, and things that make you feel uplifted. This might be hanging out with some positive friends or with a new group of positive folks, or reading a good positive thinking book like Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.
2. Limit your time and exposure to the news
3. Limit your exposure to those toxic people who always tell you that you can’t
4. Spend some quality time with yourself
5. Find “positive thinking” affirmations and activities (there is a wealth of resources online or at your local library or bookstore)
6. Try one of my E-Courses on Creating Harmony or Enjoying the Journey. Both can be found here.
There are, of course lots of other wonderful ideas that you can come up with that suit you best. Let us know about them by leaving a comment or sending us feedback through our “Contact” page.
The important thing to know is that you CAN change your life from a constantly toxic one to a healthy supportive one, but YOU HAVE TO BE WILLING TO CHANGE!
Do You Love Your Life Now!? I Do! (Because I limit my interaction with toxic people and situations!)
By Charlene M. Brown
You ever have those moments where everything is ON!? You’re feeling great, looking good. All the right people are around you and you are on top of the world!
By Charlene M. Brown
By Charlene M. Brown
I used to be the most pessimistic person I knew! I went to a very academically challenging high school and the pressure to go to college was great (to say the least!). One day in the 11th grade, I decided that I wasn’t going to worry about all the little things anymore. I was not going to “sweat the small stuff”, so to speak.
By Charlene M. Brown
What’s your comfort food? You know what I’m talking about—that ice cream or chocolate stash. Or maybe your comfort “food” is shopping. All of these are instantly gratifying, yes, but don’t address the core issue of why we feel we need to be “comforted” in the first place. Here’s a suggestion: why not incorporate your “need” for your comfort “food” into reaching your goals?
By Charlene M. Brown
Here are 7 hot tips to keep from being depressed:
7. Read a funny book (I suggest any of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum numbered novels) or go to see a funny movie or a funny play. Laughter is so important to your well being. Laugh often, laugh hard. Find humor in everyday life (the premise of sitcoms). I challenge you to try this for 3 weeks and see if you feel differently!