Archive for the 'What's So Hard About Being Intimate!?' Category
By Charlene M Brown
We’ve all heard about the woman who is so stuck on her past relationships that she can’t see the good man right in front of her. Or the man who LOVES his woman, but can’t seem to stay faithful to her. These stories are not new.
By Charlene M Brown
What IS so hard about being intimate!?
One of the toughest things you will face is Facing Yourself!
Charlene M Brown
What was the best date you ever went on! Who was it with? What did you do that made it so special?
Hold onto this delicious thought (I bet you are licking your lips for one reason or another! 
)
Now, when was the last time you took yourself on a date!?
Have you ever?
Well, hunny, it’s about time you did!
This might take some planning and saving—I understand that—but it is well worth it, I promise you! Do what it takes to make this happen anyway!
Get all dressed up! Find your favorite flirty-fun dress, add your favorite jewelry, and accessories, maybe a dab of makeup to highlight your beautiful face, now add your favorite pair of heels and you are ready to go. Don’t forget to take a wrap or a jacket if you will be chilly upon your return (or if it’s Winter or Fall!)
Now take yourself to someplace that you have always wanted to try. This might be the Opera or Ballet, or it might be a nice restaurant in town. Whatever it is, Paint the town red and have a fabulous time with yourself. Don’t worry about your first impressions of your date, just be yourself.
For me this looks like, having dinner at a nice seafood restaurant, enjoying a glass of wine or two, eating dessert (I believe in Dessert! ) then catching a show that has lots of music or dancing or both in it.
And I have done this, and found that I enjoy my own company just as much as I enjoy other peoples’ company!
If dinner is part of your date, make sure you select things that sound like the most delicious items on the menu! And don’t forget dessert! Women are always watching what they eat! Just this once, on your magnificent date, don’t worry about the calories or getting up extra early tomorrow to burn them off, just enjoy every delicious bite of your food and every sensuous sip of your drink. Delight in your decadent dessert!
If you are going to the theatre, make sure it is something you have wanted to see for awhile—make sure it’s worth it.
Before you leave the house, make sure you look in the mirror and tell your date how marvelous she looks. Just for tonight, suspend all judgment!
Just for tonight, have the time of your life!
Tell us about it by leaving a comment!
Enjoy!
Do You Love Your Life Now!? I DO!! (Because I regularly take myself out on great dates! )
By Charlene M Brown
The Hook-up Culture! Whether you recognize it by name or not, I’d bet that you know what I’m talking about.
Hooking-up with someone instead of pursuing a relationship with him. Short-term, right- now gratification that perhaps gives you the hugging and kissing and fondling (and maybe even the sex) satisfaction that you are seeking. But what do all these short term Usings (because you are being used and using someone else) look like carried into the future when you DO want a long term relationship!?
While mostly prevailing among high school- and college-aged women, us grown folks do it to. In our instantaneous technology driven culture, sometimes we forget how to see things to completion, how to make things work for the long haul.
For some of us even thinking about the “long haul” makes us squeamish, especially when it comes to relationships.
However, what are you gaining by repeatedly selling yourself short? In past generations, you would have gained “a reputation” which would have made you less desirable for marriage. But we’re in modern times now. Our social rules of etiquette have changed! And I, for one, am glad that women have this wonderful freedom of choice and that so many of us exercise it.
Recently in the news, there was a big hubbub about Michelle Obama, the First Lady, wearing shorts as she went on vacation in the desert in the summertime! Really!? Shorts!? Not some scandalous outfit that she wore along K Street in DC’s Red Light District! Get over it! Who was really up in arms about that anyway! Some “anonymous source”, I’m sure!
But I digress.
Mrs. Obama, thankfully, appeared to not be ruffled at all. (Okay, so that was still part of the digression—I’m done now, promise!)
Back to us twenty- and thirty-somethings and our fear of commitment! Oops! Did I say that out loud?
Well, since I said it, yeah, I mean it! We, as a culture, are afraid of commitment.
Since we are so afraid to commit to anything, we “try out”, sample, if you will, many different things (by things I mean intimate partners in this case). But I ask you, where is the intimacy when you share your Self with so many different people!?
It is not! By definition, intimacy means a certain closeness with another. Sleeping around (or fondling around, as the case may be), doesn’t lend itself to closeness, just by the mere fact that you are doing it with so many people.
Here again, I say you’re selling yourself short!
This is not Baskin Robbins, where you can just discard your little plastic spoon once you are done with that flavor. Yet this is exactly what we are doing!
Ladies, think about this: we live in a culture that says that women can go just as far as men. And we are encouraged to do so, in school, in work and even in the bedroom. There is a lot to be said for sexual freedom and having the ability to make decisions about what we do in our private lives. But I ask you this: when you get up and leave in the morning (or middle of the night), do you feel empowered? Or do you still feel the same emptiness you were trying to fill?
I’d bet on emptiness every time, even after the Power has disappeared. (Note here that feeling POWERful and being EMPOWERED are two totally different things!)
I’d bet, that when you look in the mirror later, you will still feel like you need to fill that void.
This is why we are selling ourselves short! We deserve better! We all deserve to be Loved and Feel Beautiful!
But guess where this has to start!?
With Us!
We have to make ourselves beautiful!
I’m not talking about swiping on layers and layers of makeup which hides our true selves. I’m talking about genuinely liking and loving WHO YOU ARE!
Only then, will our real beauty shine through and we will Know our SELF WORTH!
Ladies, Collectively, WE HAVE TO STOP SELLING OURSELVES SHORT!
Join with me in Loving Your Life Now!
Do You Love Your Life Now!? I DO (Because I Am Beautiful and try not to sell myself short!)!
By Charlene M Brown
By Charlene M. Brown
By Charlene M. Brown
Intimacy is one of those things that is very easy to say, but terribly difficult to act out.
By Charlene M. Brown
He did you wrong! He broke your heart and destroyed your Spirit! You got so depressed when he left your life! Does any of this sound familiar? Is it your present state of mind rather than your past? Hmmmm . . . .