By Charlene M Brown
I have a sage friend who says: “Relationships will end as they began.”
By Charlene M Brown
Have you ever gone from relationship to relationship, yet still feel alone and lonely? Have you drawn the somewhat clichéd conclusion that, “it’s not them, it’s you?”
Do you find that even with companionship, you still feel unfulfilled? Perhaps you are afraid to be alone?
This happens to the best of us at one time or another.
Relationships (ALL relationships) teach us how to be our best selves. Sometimes, unfortunately, they teach us by showing us how we DON’T want to be treated!
If you’ve fallen into this lapse, let me offer you a suggestion: get out of the relationship you are in and get into a relationship with YOURSELF!
Date yourself!
That’s right, start courting yourself, taking yourself out on dates and really loving yourself.
It sounds silly, but by dating yourself, you find out how you really want to be treated and what you really expect from a partner.
It also sheds light on where your expectations are unrealistic for a partner: if you’re not willing to do these things for yourself, than how can you expect someone else to do them for you!?
Seriously, this works! I’ve done it!
You also really GROW as an individual. You learn to make yourself whole and complete all by yourself.
When you date yourself, you find out what you really want. And go full out! Get dressed for your first date and rock your sexiest heels!
Take mental notes as you do this!
Do you always go for ice cream after a movie, but never have with a partner? This teaches you to speak up (“the squeaky wheel gets the oil”, or in this case the ice cream).
Do you really dislike Vietnamese food, but have gone to appease a partner. Maybe you love Thai food, but never voiced this to your partner.
Dating yourself gives you a real idea of your preferences. It also shows you what you are looking for in a mate.
Ladies, does your guy always pick up the tab? Dating yourself puts a realistic monetary picture of what he is spending (times 2!) every time you go out.
This also gives you a chance to get to know you better.
A partnership should be between two whole people, not one completing the other. You should be able to stand on your own two feet before you try to stand on four. Once you’ve dated yourself, it will boost your confidence—telling other people: yes, I can do this by myself!” And all without saying a word!
I suggest dating yourself at least once in your life and for at least six months! This is a reasonable amount of time to get to know your Self and deal with whatever may come up. Learn how to wine and dine yourself, so you know how to communicate this to a partner when the time comes again.
Do You Love Your Life Now!? I Do! (Because I can wine and dine myself with the best of them!)
By Charlene M Brown
By Charlene M. Brown
Ladies, have you ever had that great guy: you enjoy his company, you see him pretty often, he is gentlemanly, and you have a great time when you are with him? Yet, he won’t agree to taking the next step and being in a relationship with you?